Posts Tagged ‘drained’

Each day you have to wake up and take control of your thoughts. Although it sounds pretty easy right, it is far from it.  The reason being is that you have to truly discipline yourself in this area.

I started a new role with the same company that I have been with for over 8 years. This position has truly been a difficult one. Get this; I am a perfectionist, quick learner, structured individual who needs clear direction, patience and organization to succeed in pretty much most of the things I take on in my life. This role supplies none of that, which makes me daily question my existence here, purpose and why I even chose the role in the 1st place.

With all this issues, I struggle each day to make it mentally and figuratively. My thoughts are always negative tearing me down even more to the point it is affecting my health. My stress levels are always at an extreme high. I suffer from back pain with no desire to wake up in the mornings. I have slim to no patience for my husband and children and very snappy with my peers.

I had to slap myself literally back into my Spiritual Reality and remind myself who my Father is and where my Faith lies. This was a true wakeup call! God reminded me that he is still in control and sees the Big picture. More so he is the orchestra of the Big Picture. Yes I see nothing but confusion and disorganization here, but he sees something oh so different.

I have tried daily to take on this role and view it in the eyes of the Lord. And he views me in every situation as a Success and that I will be. More so I prayed for this job and he Blessed me with it. (Proverbs 16:3 – Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and your plans will succeed.)

What helps me daily are the following:

  • Every morning, I look at this yearly devotional (got it for Christmas) that stands next to my alarm clock with scriptures reminding me of what God says to and about me daily.
  • I bought a journal from Target called the Bucket List. I write my feelings down every day to avoid becoming overwhelmed by them. It allows me to write my passions, hopes and fears (this helps a lot!!!)
  • Prayer daily and throughout the day
  • Speak God’s word to myself aloud and within
  • Draw pictures (funny but love this – visual picture of myself conquering and overcoming) of how I want to feel and what I want to accomplish daily
  • Write out my exact feelings (Happy, Productive etc.) that I want to feel and write a scripture to back it up
  • When I struggle and I will – simply remind yourself of who your Father is and that he has your back

Verse of choice

II Corinthians 12:9 – My Grace is Sufficient for thee: for my Strength is made Perfect in Weakness.

 

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Yesterday was a struggle for me. I thought that I was just physically tired, but soon began to realize that I was actually emotionally drained which impacted my whole being. While at work, I just didn’t really want to be bothered by anyone. I knew that what I was feeling was not of God and that it was a crack that Satan could enter to use against me. I decided not today!

So I got up and went into our game room at the office and began to pray and read about God’s love. When I walked out I felt so much better. I knew that familiar place, but this time I knew a remedy for it and it was to turn to God and not myself. I began to remind myself of His love and how he still loves me when I am acting like this and how he still wants to bless me more than I could dream!

I was reminded by the Spirit that I needed to constantly bath in the love of God and his teachings. As this is the only way that I could withstand those difficulty times. I am reminded that I must feast on God daily. Taste his new manna every morning. He has to stay apart of my daily routine because without him, I will fall back into my old ways. And this I do not want because in him I have been set free and I want to say free indeed!

One thing that I have learned in my spiritual walk with God is – when you have not feasted on him in a while, your body (God) will certainly remind you. It’s like your body goes into starvation mode feasting on any and everything it finds – whether its reality shows, other people’s drama, bad/negative music or thoughts that are not of God. Leaving you to feel empty! I am a witness to this because I have felt this way after I have feasted on those unhealthy things – so much so my body and spirit gets so weak that I have to turn back to God – and feast on those things that are pure and lovely (healthy food) – those things that will build me up and not break me down – those things that will keep my foundation strong when the wind blows!

****Philippians 4:8-9  Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things.9The things you have learned and received and heard and seen in me, practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you.****